Evaluating the semester

Grade Distributions came out recently (the registrar prints out a sheet of how many people go what grade in each class). While my overall GPA and class rank for the fall semester was exceptional, my performances in my classes was pretty poor. Honestly, I got one of the lowest grades in one class. While I would like to attribute my performance to a number of distractions (interviews, law review, football, etc.), truth is that the buck stops here so to speak. Somehow, I was at the top of the middle of the curve in every class (with one or two exceptions). Again, I would like to attribute this to many factors: taking classes I wasn't interested in because they have a high grade distribution, taking 16 hours, having classes where everyone was in the top 10% of their class, the professor's vision problems while grading my paper, etc. I don't think I can do that. Truth is, I dropped the ball. Fact is, despite my overall poor performance (in my Type A opinion), I somehow managed to be at the very top of the class right at the benchmark number. What does this say? Frankly, it says that there is a good deal of gamesmanship in being at the top of your class. I think, after all, taking classes that did not interest me because they had a high grade distribution paid off. Even though it may have lowered my performance (maybe), that lowered performance was still better than most of the law school. I wonder why everyone hasn't caught on to this? I've heard a lot of "this is a BAR class." To me, that translates to "this is a low curve class." Then again, I think I have the determination and independence to learn BAR material in a bar prep course (as most professors have told me to do- that is, instead of taking BAR classes for the sake of taking BAR classes).

I'm a bit down, but I really shouldn't be. I expect better of myself and seeing how I did in each class really made me contrite. Last thing I need is a downer right now. There's law review, moot court is kicking my ass and writing my name on the board, I'm a research assistant for a prof. who is "loan sharking" me for more research, and I took an outside commitment to research and edit a Thompson West Treatise, oh yeah- there is still the law review comment which is too promising to give up on. I will finish all of this by March 14. But, that will have me ripe for studying for finals and right now my class preparation is Zero. I'm screwed.