Monday, February 2, 2009

1L YaYas are Starting to Annoy Me...Really

Congratulations, you survived first semester. It was a traumatic experience... I remember. Then again, I slacked off, partied ostentatiously before exams (still do) and still kicked ass. That's just what I do. So you didn't do as well as you wanted? Well, really you should have taken my advice ("know it all and you'll be fine, works every time").

So what are 1Ls doing? They're being little bitches.

As far as I know, they are going out and buying a pair of jeans and wearing them and having life changing experiences and then mailing them to their other 1L friends to do the same. There is this whole YaYa sisterhood going on with the 1Ls. They have formed these really annoying, pathetic, and vain support groups. "It's okay, I did poorly too...but, we're going to study together in the law school atrium, then starbucks, and then at Phaedrus's table. We're going to work hard, struggle, achieve, persevere and we're going to raise our GPA & Classrank and then make law review, then work at biglaw, and then work 40 hours a week and retire early." Well, at least the GPA thing. I can't figure out why this annoys me so, other than it is completely pathetic. It's childish. It's futile. It's taking away my study table. It's really just a lame excuse for the friend who really needs a boyfriend to feel better about herself.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about goals: setting them, achieving them, exceeding them. Just don't take my table. Get a life, watch Grey's Anatomy together like most normal girls, go buy new nike running shorts that never get used for running, or even (Gasp) try to go on a date. Despite the feel good talk professors give you this time of the year about grades, grades are pretty much locked in. First you are graded on a curve--it really puts you in your place. While there is usually an exception or two, this is usually an exception or two--it's not Good Will Hunting. Even if you come to school, clean the floors, think you're smarter than everyone else, and do complex math/legal problems on the board, you're probably not the exception. Second, people at the top of the class are usually smarter than you. What does this mean? It means they know better than to take graded classes. The whole art of law school is taking 75% ungraded classes and 25% guaranteed A's... this locks in your GPA and Class rank.

Long story short, the Law School Traveling Pants YaYa Studygroup Sisterhood should get a life, a boyfriend, or disband. I don't really care, just do one.


El Guapo said...

I gave one a pep talk the other day. I told her not to worry because 3/4 of her class failed to finish in the top 1/4 of her class. I just wanted to put it in perspective.

Phaedrus said...

I love that one, but it's not quite as good as "Only 10% of lawyers graduated in the top 10% of their class."