Wireless Internet: How to Hack a Secure System

I am sitting on Phaedrus's couch as I write this post. I am on Phaedrus's laptop, through which he has been leeching Comcast broadband service for over one year. Here is an illustrative anecdote to explain the intelligence level of the average [school] football fan here:

Instructions for "hacking" into a wireless network in this city:

1. acquire a computer capable of detecting wireless connections
2. allow computer to automatically detect wireless connections within range
3. select wireless network entitled "WinorLoseWeBooze#1"
4. 1st attempted password: "default"
5. 2nd attempt: "admin"
6. 3rd attempt: "password"
7. slap self for lack of insight
4. remind self that this is a football school
5. remind self that 90% of fans at this school are hammered by 5 AM (even for night games) on gameday
6. remind self it is Saturday
7. remind self there is a rivalry game today, kickoff 6 PM
8. 4th attempt: "[wearepennstate]"
9, load homepage
10. impose externality on Comcast and their customers
11. cry self to sleep several hours later because someone with the common sense to lock a wireless connection made it that easy
12. realize that among other things, "hacking" is not the correct term because it implies a degree of difficulty that at approaches Candyland

A One-Sided Divorce: Trees, Rabbits, and Questioning Humanity

I don't even know what to nickname our Family Law prof. He has the best stories, as most divorce lawyers seem to. I'll post some of them here from time to time. Taking suggestions on names for him.

Story
“I represented this one guy who wanted the trees out of his front yard and the six rabbits they had. That's it, no house, no money, nothing...just the trees and the rabbits. He would NOT budge. I told him the judge would never award him the trees in the yard by themselves, but he refused to come off it. I was embarrassed to go to the other lawyer and tell him about the trees and rabbits. But the judge gave him the trees and rabbits. About a week later, I called the guy to see how he was doing.

Attorney: ‘What happened to those rabbits, they keeping you company?’
Client: ‘Nope. Ate ‘em.’
Attorney: ... ... ... ... ... *stunned silence* 'Well...what about the trees??? We dug them out of the yard, replanted them, and re-sodded the yard, not to mention the billable hours it cost to get all that done. You realize this cost you thousands of dollars, right?'
Client: 'Bitch took my stove, but not my axe, my lighter fluid, or my lawn chairs. How do you think I cooked the rabbits?'"
/end story

The sad thing is that one day, he will tell one of these stories and a student will recognize one of his/her relatives as the subject.

Worst Interview Question... EVER!

I've been traveling the East Coast trying to fit three federal clerkship interviews into two days. In my first interview came the worst question I have ever been asked:

"What is the worst case you read last semester and why?"

I couldn't answer that I have not read a case since October of my first year, but my real answer would have been the worst case I have read would be the Nutshells, they are so small. I prefer the Understanding series or the High Court Case Summaries.

Ultimately, I went with Carroll Towing because it was the only case name I could remember other than Pennoyer or Int'l Shoe and it's progeny. How can you criticize the latter two?

Also, watching a replay of The Office as I type this, Michael Scott just said my fourth favorite line on the show, "If you don't get no respect, you might be a redneck."